Our Inner Conflicts by Karen Horney

 Our Inner Conflicts by Karen Horney


 

The name Karen Horney is mentioned in other psychology books that I read. Tal Ben-Sharar, in his lectures on Positive Psychology at Harvard mentions her contribution.

The fact is that I grew much more interested in Positive Psychology and less in psychology in general. It probably has to do a lot with the fact that I had my own issues, depressions and angry moods and I live in a society which has suffered a lot in communism and after it. I need more positive readings and less about problems conflicts.

The truth is that I had started this book before the interest in just one field of psychology became acute, otherwise I wouldn’t have started. The reading of the book suffered because of lost interest and wandering thoughts.

Here are some passages that I have found interesting:

“The aggressive type takes it for granted that everyone is hostile and refuses to admit that they are not. To him life is a struggle of all against all… his set of values is built around the philosophy of the jungle…home homini lupus “

“Some jump to their childhood and pin all the explanations on that. They are sensitive to coercion because they had a domineering mother…they are easily humiliated because humiliations were suffered in childhood, they are vindictive because of early injuries…this leads to nothing but endless repetition…”

“One defense against the recognition of conflicts is elusiveness. Patients so inclined resemble characters that turn into fish, then into deer and then birds…you can never pin them down, they deny having said it…”

“In Zen Buddhist writings sincerity is equated with wholeheartedness- nobody divided within himself can be sincere”

“The aggressive type has definite opinions, defends and sticks to them…often his opinions will have a dogmatic character, even fanatic “

“An analyst must convey to the patient that his situation is hopeless only as long as the situation persists: a scene from The Cherry Orchard:

The family, faced with bankruptcy is in despair over the cherry orchard – a solution is presented: to build small houses over part of the estate…they cannot accept such a project and since there is no other solution, they remain without hope…

An analyst should tell them: what makes this hopeless is your attitude, if you change your claims on life, there would be no need to feel hopeless…”

“What is typical of sadism is an active impulse to thwart others, to kill their joy: if the partner looks forward to see him, he tends to be sullen.

If the partner wants sexual intercourse he will be frigid or impotent…by simply radiating gloom he acts as a depressant… to quote Aldous Huxley:

“He did not have to do anything: it was enough for him to just be. They shriveled and turned black by mere infection.”

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